Funny how when I feel life is slowly coming into pieces and then it shatters again, again, and again.

Someone that I thought would never hurt me ended up causing me to pick up the pieces.

Loving him is too hurtful yet I can't pull myself away, I keep thinking we can make it work. Over and over again in my brain.  But I think he didn't want to try anymore, maybe everything is too much for him. This whole thing hurts him more than he can take. 

But what about me? He's been treating me hot and cold and I think it affecting my brain too.

I never felt so lonely and hurt at the same time. I feel like I don't deserve anything nice at all. Everything was ruined because of me. Every mistake, he didn't claim ended up causing me to feel like the victim. 

I can't do this. I do want to be in any of this anymore. 

You know that euphoric feeling when you're doing something that you love? Mine is riding the train, and getting on board on flight. This is my escape with a little splash of Ariana's song in my brain